Hunger Games with Squirrels

Everyone has a different relationship with nature. I very much enjoyed The Hunger Games, which I picked up around 2AM yesterday and finished around 4PM today. It was a surprisingly addictive book, but it reminded me that I would be very bad at a hunter/gatherer lifestyle. 

Katniss shoots squirrels and trades them for bread. I give squirrels bread. I worry that this is backfiring, though. I was sitting around drinking coffee when I happened to look up and see this: 

whisperwhisperBREADwhisperwhisper

This is what I get for sitting in front of windows. They know the food is inside, and they're starting to mobilize. I have seen single scouts scaling the door before, but this is the first time I've seen coordinated motion. In fact, I have never seen squirrels so close together without one chasing the other off. 

If there's going to be an invasion, I suppose I can take a few lessons on survival from The Hunger Games. Let's see, what did I learn from this book? 

Survival is easiest when nomming the flesh of cute things. 

Dying of thirst would suck. So would starving.

It would be stressful to play The Most Dangerous Game with high schoolers. 

I am incapable of reading the character with the accent the author uses for Katniss's narration.

I devoured the book in two days, but it didn't leave me hungry enough to get the sequel. 

Hm. 

Conclusion: if it comes down to a battle royale of me vs. the squirrels, I'll throw my cat at them and run.