If you are reading this, I assume you were looking for a tiger.

I could apologize for skipping internet-town for a year, but I've been living in an area with a really terrible internet infrastructure. It's not even first world problems at this point. It's mainly just problems.

And I've been busy. My job is very top secret eyes only history brain overload. I can't say much more than it involves some founding fathers and the things they got in the mail. True Fact: Jefferson was sent more hate mail than grizzly bears. Factual no matter how you parse that garden path. Mhm. Anyway, I really can't go into more detail, because it's all very hush hush wobble wobble. 

I've been working hard and singlemindedly at this job, because that's the only way I can work on anything. With a certain OCD exclusion of all else. And that exclusion has included some very important things that I should be doing. Like writing. Well, the first step is admitting you have a problem. 

So today I'm home with a cold and hopped up on cold medication to try to combat the deep fog between my ears and fever and chills and abject misery! And in this miserable state I went to check my email. What do I find in my inbox? Alerts that I am getting spam messages on my blog! Huzzah! I instantly realize two things:
  1. Spam? Blogger, what the hell? This is why I couldn't handle Wordpress!
  2. Wait, I have a blog!?
So here I am, headache out the ears and smacked in the face with the realization that I would totally get a dishonorable discharge for cowardice and abandoning my post in blogging. 

I locked eyes with my blog and decided that this is going to change. 

First stage of reclaiming my blog space: I decided to look into what my blog had been doing without my presence, and I discovered that the blog traffic patterns had changed dramatically. How do people get here? It used to be people searching things like "Kat Zantow" or "A Face all Planes and Angles" or "Villains by Necessity." Now? Anyone who's everyone gets here searching "white tiger." You can find that one picture with a Google image search, and that's the way it happens. That's cool, but it hardly seems relevant to anything I do...unless...I think it's time for...

THE OBVIOUS CONCLUSION: Retool the site into a furry erotica blog!

Step 1. They come for the tigers.  
Step 2. They stay for the tigers. 
Step 3. They come for the tigers.
Step 4. Profit!

It's the only way to synthesize content and site traffic. Maybe I can start light with some paranormal romance fiction, but I don't know if it will be enough...

1 comment:

V to the Z said...

Oh dear. Now that you have posted those exact key words, watch the traffic bloom.


Also, feel better. Now.